Who do these folks...

Think they're foolin'... the whole Hollywood machine exists to exploit...I was walking from my Beijing bed-and-breakfast to a nearby subway station when I was stopped in my tracks by a billboard that made the controversial 1990s Calvin Klein underwear ads look artistic by comparison.And who's right there in the middle of it?Staring down at the throngs of shoppers on Beijing's Xinjiekou Nandajie Avenue,...

Memo to David Miller

I think we're gonna need a knife ban too. -- BRAMPTON, Ont. -- A gruesome multiple stabbing at a Brampton strip mall early this afternoon has left two people dead, including a bystander who tried to intervene in what police believe was a domestic dispute.Both the woman and the Good Samaritan died at the plaza, which was quickly flooded with police cruisers and emergency vehicles and cordoned off...

MACLEANS SUIT - offer to settle

Well... we're certainly off to a fine start.TORONTO, April 30 /CNW/ - "The assertion that the editors were prepared to consider a reasonable counter-view article to Mark Steyn's Islamophobic polemic is a complete fabrication," said Muneeza Sheikh, one of the students present at the meeting.I'm not sure ol' Muneeza fully appreciates the concept of "settling"... in a Canadian legal context... which...

Gotta have priorities, I guess

So the Fiberals spent hundreds of millions of dollars to acquire computers and software for the not-especially-functional Farmer Bob Rifle Registry.Maybe they should have had a bit of a wider perspective... OTTAWA — The Canada Revenue Agency has extended the deadline for online tax filing to May 6 as a result of heavy traffic that has bogged down its Netfile website.“If you have difficulty sending...

Who is Lindsay Stewart?

More to the point... why would anybody car...

That David Ahenakew...

Such a kidder..."But Chief Lawrence Joseph says he doesn't believe his friend and the former national chief of the Assembly of First Nations ever meant it when he called Jews 'a disease' in 2002."**********RELATED: Too much Chief... not enough logicMohawks of the Bay of Quinte Chief R. Donald Maracle said his council was still trying to keep peace Tuesday.He said about 20 protesters met him at the...

Where's the fire?

When I watch Barack Obama on TV, it seems like he's in a play... he's just acting like he wants to get elected... "The Illinois senator doesn’t pay attention to the mythic nature of campaigns, but if he did, he would recognize the narrative of the classic hero myth: The young hero ventures out on an adventure to seek a golden fleece or an Oval Office; he has to kill monsters and face hurdles before...

No Rumours... No Funeral

And the cops who were hospitalised... and the trench the terrorists, er... gentle aboriginal protesters cut across a road with a backhoe... do we blame that on rumours too?Michael Bryant says both the road barricade of a local highway and the recent blockade of a rail line are being dismantled.He says the blockade - which was erected in solidarity with aboriginal protesters in eastern Ontario - went...

See Iggy, the thing is...

You're confusing "publicity stunts"... with actually helping to run the country... which, as much as it pains me to say it... is what you're really supposed to be doing...“I find it unbelievable that a governing party in Canada would refuse to support a motion expressing confidence in the institution that keeps our country's elections fair... And I think Canadian citizens will find it unbelievable,”...

Well, I see from Sitemeter...

That I've been linked to, yet again, by potty-mouthed poseur... Canadian Cynic. CC is actually my most avid linker, though, strangely, there never seems to be that much resultant traffic from his site. I'm guessing the fact that he feels obligated to use the word c@nt in every other sentence, may...

Oh good, I was a little worried...

They might not be putting those tax dollars to good use...According to figures obtained by Sun Media under Access to Information, the number of practising Wiccans and Pagans behind bars has tripled in the last five years. In 2002 there were just 25, compared to 77 in 2007, data from the Correctional Service of Canada show.Apparently it's important to have all the right equipment.According to an internal...

CTV and Lt.-Cmdr. William Kuebler...

Are both lying through their teeth...He noted that "an overwhelming majority of Canadians" polled don't believe Khadr will receive a fair hearing in the U.S. and would like him returned home to Canada.See, that's a little funny... because CTV's sister company, the Globe & Mail, recently ran a poll...

"I hope Steyn takes the letter..."

"...crumbles it up and dips it in a cup of ketchup and then eats it right there on stage in front of them." "Oh God, hear my prayer, please let this happen."Even the collateral damage is pretty pleasing....and generally served to marginalize the pro-censorship lobby to the point that its main defender is now a disgruntled former journalist who fills his blog with unhinged conspiracy theories about...

BLACKBALLED!!!

Captain Obama forced to cut tow-rope to the good ship... "SS Jeremiah Wright"...The presidential candidate is seeking to tamp down the growing fury over Rev. Jeremiah Wright and his incendiary remarks that threaten to envelope his campaign.“I am outraged by the comments that were made and saddened by the spectacle that we saw yesterday,” Mr. Obama told reporters at a news conference.I just wanna know......

Pay me now... or pay me later

-- Pop Quiz -- What's flat, black and glows in the dark? -- Answer -- It sure as shit ain't gonna be Tel-Aviv. -- Iran -- The sprawling site, known as Natanz, made headlines recently because Iran is testing a new generation of centrifuges there that spin faster and, in theory, can more rapidly turn natural uranium into fuel for reactors or nuclear arms.Iran is slowly but steadily gaining...

Alright, Toronto...

Congratulations on solving that nasty guns and gangs issue...City council endorsed David Miller's handgun ban yesterday, but left the mayor three votes shy of winning unanimous support.It's tough to get unanimous support at Toronto council, Miller noted. But he said the city made a "strong and powerful step" towards eliminating guns from the streets."Will it put an end to all guns in our country that...

Let the Liberals...

Take over rescuing Ms. Congeniality... and the federal government can go back to looking after the other thousand Canadians imprisoned abroad..."It's a process than can take nine months if both sides agree, yet Ms. Martin could set a record for speedy departures if she's released this week. Not good enough, fumed Ms. Martin after a meeting with two MPs, the Canadian ambassador and a few embassy officials."...

"Quick, Igor... bring me a brain!"

Well, it's not like we couldn't see this one coming...Users of the facility provide their own illegal drugs and have access to medical personnel. But they are not arrested because the federal government provides an exemption saying the site is a pilot project for scientific and medical evaluation."The relief sought by the plaintiffs has implications well beyond this," said Hunter, the lawyer representing...

Okay, I admit it... I was wrong

Climate change IS killing people..."In bad years, the killings explode," Professor Miguel said. He believes that if climate change causes more drought years in Tanzania, the result will be more elderly women executed there and in other poor countries that still commonly attack supposed witche...

With friends like this...

Who needs Hillary...

Nope... not Polkaroo either...

Guess again..."I don’t feel very well. I feel dizzy, I feel anxiety, and I am not in a serene state of mind to proceed with this file today." "I have a lot of things worrying me right now and I don’t want to elaborate… I am not dying, Mr. Chair, I don’t have the flu, but I am not mentally capable of proceeding under these circumstances...

Affirmative Action... here I come

I don't know about you... but I'm looking forward to becoming a visible minority... -- OTTAWA -- The identity of Canadians is diversifying so quickly that at the current rate the majority of the country's residents will be hyphenated Canadians by 2021, a new study by a Montreal researcher predicts.While...

Hey, Dalton...

Just for a change... how about you try being Premier of "all of the people?" -- Caledonia, ON -- A renewed Six Nations blockade of a southern Ontario highway is pushing residents to the brink and is paving the way for a repeat of violent clashes between protesters and town residents, the mayor of the beleaguered town said Monday."This shouldn't be allowed," Haldimand County Mayor Marie Trainer...

Have it your way

Don't be too surprised if ol' Baitullah gets turned into something resembling "special sauce" in the near future... Pakistan's top Taliban commander has suspended rare peace talks with the country's new government.A spokesman for Baitullah Mehsud said Monday that Mehsud broke off the talks because the government is refusing to withdraw the army from a tribal region bordering Afghanistan. There has...

So Jason, does that include...

Killing another police officer?Ontario Provincial Police can expect "another Oka crisis" should they decide to enter a quarry occupied by native protesters for more than a year, warns a Mohawk leader.You mean another "manufactured Oka crisis", right Jason?OPP Staff Sgt. Steve Flynn informed the Mohawks...

Considering the "cultural disconnect"

Obviously... one man's deeper truth... is another man's "crazy as a shithouse mouse." -- Robert Fulford, NAT POST -- The four men, uneasy comrades at best, exhibit mutual jealousy and sharp policy disagreements as well as passionate hatred of the non-Muslim world. They are often described as thinkers and theorists but an outsider, reading their texts in translation, may find it hard to identify...

Maybe he went out for a smoke

The capricious and unknowable "Will of Allah." -- BAGHDAD -- American and Iraqi troops killed 38 militants in the fiercest clashes in weeks in Baghdad, including 22 who attacked a military checkpoint in a Shiite militia stronghold, the U.S. military said Monday.Or maybe that "surge" thing is workin...

If he's afraid of Hillary...

What's he gonna do the next time Osama comes knockin...

I'm from the government...

I'm here to save you... -- TORONTO -- A woman caught up in a mysterious Internet hijacking scandal that has sparked a federal privacy investigation into the Canadian Human Rights Commission says she was shocked, angry and confused at suddenly finding herself publicly associated with white supremacists.Speaking out for the first time, Nelly Hechme told The Canadian Press she was appalled to learn...

If TTC drivers get more money...

It's gonna eat into Mayor Miller's ambitious socialist agenda...Hains was one of about 200 housing and social welfare advocates to attend the meeting to discuss Toronto's 10-year, $469-million-a year Housing Opportunities Toronto (HOT) – An Affordable Housing Framework 2008-2018.C'mon Toronto (taxpayers)... give til it hurts.**********FROM THE COMMENTS:"You're wrong! Being a BIG CiTY. the government...

Game, Set and Match

Say... has anybody seen Jeffy "Bugboy" Davidson lately? -- LA Story -- So I'm at the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books. I've done my paneling duties, and I'm sitting under a tent to sign books. The (short) queue terminates, and up comes a guy with a videocamera."Remember me?" Amd I do - it's the same 9/11 denialist who showed up at a LA Public Library event I did some weeks ago."Still think...

"Nothing says God is great...

...like 00-buck...

His numbers may be down...

But George Bush sure isn't sittin' around... feelin' sorry for himself. -- WASHINGTON -- U.S. President George Bush poked fun at his potential successors Saturday night, expressing surprise that none of them were in the audience at the White House Correspondents' Association annual dinner."Senator McCain's not here," Bush said of GOP nominee-in-waiting John McCain. "He probably wanted to distance...

That flexible Taliban strategy

If we can't nail Karzai... we'll just settle for whoever happens to be sitting around. -- KABUL -- Afghan President Hamid Karzai and Canadian ambassador Arif Lalani were among the dignitaries forced to take cover Sunday when automatic gunfire erupted during a ceremony marking 16 years since the overthrow of the country's Soviet-backed rule.Mr. Karzai, his cabinet and foreign diplomats who were...

Screw the corn-eatin' third world...

It's not like they can afford cars anyway. -- California -- WHAT if you could make fuel for your car in your backyard for less than you pay at the pump? Would you?The first question has driven Floyd S. Butterfield for more than two decades. Mr. Butterfield, 52, is something of a legend for people who make their own ethanol. In 1982, he won a California Department of Food and Agriculture contest...

In other homegrown terrorist news...

Wonder what Dalton's gonna give them this time around... -- Caledonia, ON -- A council of Six Nations men has decided that their ongoing blockade of the Highway 6 bypass in Caledonia will continue until police back off in a Deseronto, Ont. native dispute.Six Nations protest spokesperson Brian Skye said the Caledonia blockade, which has slowed traffic in the town, could last a long time.Geez......

More Deseronto from local paper

If you live here in Ontario... you should thank your lucky stars... these people aren't your neighbours...As Barnhart was meeting with reporters, OPP Staff Sgt. Steve Flynn informed the Mohawks if they remained on Deseronto Road they would be arrested. He advised them to return to the quarry or be charged and taken into custody."If you stay here you'll be arrested. If you go back to the quarry you'll...

Sheppard and Keele gets the nod...

As Canada returns to the good ol' days of segregation...Canada's first Africentric alternative school will be a school within a school – not a free-standing building – and is being proposed for a wing of sprawling Sheppard Public School near the northwest corner of Sheppard Ave. W. and Keele St.The pilot program, which Sheppard principal Ira Applebaum called an "exciting opportunity" in a letter last...

There's a burning question

Tehran's former police chief Reza Zarei attempted suicide in prison yesterday, a month after being arrested for consorting with six naked women in a brothel. In the aftermath of the scandal, the Times, the Associated Press, and the BBC all reported that prostitutes are becoming more visible on Iranian streets. Given the Islamic dress code, how do Persian prostitutes signal their trad...

You take all your tactical cues...

From HAMAS... don't be too surprised when the roof falls in on you..."If we don't get this settled down soon, this is going to make Caledonia look like nothing," said one native protester who asked that his name not be used. "Six Nations protesters are on their way and so are the people who have been at Caledonia. This has nasty potential."You just have to love the chutzpah here. Even hardened, gangbangin'...

I think I've actually found the answer...

To that age-old question... "Who died and made you King?"Private Property4) An inspector who is carrying out their functions may enter on or pass through or over private property without being liable for doing so and without the owner of the property having the right to object to that use of the property.Hey, Inspector... I'm with Mike on this one.Unless we're talking about "hot pursuit" of... I dunno......

I guess SCC Judges...

Don't ever get on planes to go anywhere..."The Supreme Court has ruled the use of sniffer dogs in random searches is unlawful. Do you agree with the decision?"(poll at c...

Deseronto... the guns come out

It's past time to shut these sociopaths down. -- DESERONTO, Ont. -- Mohawk protesters and provincial police officers were involved in a tense standoff in Deseronto, Ont., on Friday after officers said they spotted at least one gun among the demonstrators.Police say they spotted a ‘long gun' being pointed at them from a location inside an occupied quarry, which protesters have controlled since...

Ask a Toronto Taliban

Okay... has anybody got the phone number for CSIS handy? -- Q -- You reject democracy, you support the Taliban and you believe that fundamentalist Islam is the only way to live. So why do you choose to live in Canada, a democratic nation with freedom of religion that is at war with the Taliban?...

The IAEA...

About as useful as grease nipples on an emu...The head of the International Atomic Energy Agency has criticized the United States for withholding intelligence the U.S. says shows North Korea was helping Syria build a nuclear reactor.He also condemned Israel for destroying the suspected site during an airstrike last September, but said the IAEA is taking the intelligence seriously and will investigate...

Riding the d'uh train

Hey, Gomer... they catch you handin' out syringes, or crackpipes... in this neck of the woods... somebody's gonna hand you your ass..."I just don't think it's helping," said RCMP Chief Supt. Derek Ogden, director general for drugs and organized crime. "If you're just experimenting with cocaine and people are handing out crack pipes at will, really I think it sends the wrong message, and could actually...

Just one more example...

Of what happens when you don't aggressively enforce the law of the land... against everyone equally..."The majority of contraband tobacco seized by the RCMP from B.C. from Newfoundland do come from the American side of the Akwesasne Mohawk Territory," Sgt. Michael Harvey said Thursday as the RCMP prepared to dispose of enough tobacco to make 3.7 million cigarettes, seized from the reserve straddling...

New "improved" Bob Rae

Yeah... I remember how he fixed Ontario...What Rae is saying (if one is generous) is that no matter how despicable China's record of abusing its own people, of killing its own citizens, of harvesting the organs of dissidents for sale to rich foreigners, and its continued abuse of minorities, we shouldn't say so because the Chinese might not like it and might not buy our natural resources.Bunk, of...

Blast from the Past

Though pinball has roots in the 1800s game of bagatelle, these are by no means simple machines. Each one contains a half-mile of wire and 3,500 tiny components, and takes 32 hours to build — as the company’s president, Gary Stern, likes to say, longer than a Ford Tauru...

Save us, oh wise Dalton

Hey Premier... whatever happened to that proposed, lifesaving ban on sharp pointy objects? -- Scarborough -- A 22-year-old man has become the city's 15th murder victim of the year.Police were called to an apartment on Cougar Ct. - in the Markham Rd.-Eglinton Ave. area - just after midnight this morning.They found the man inside suffering from a single stab wound to the chest. He was rushed to...

The Guy Who’s Where He Is...

Only Because He’s Black..."Frankly it’s a lot better than my last two gigs, The Guy Who Left the Seat Up and The Guy Who Took the Last Beer...

C'mon... who're ya gonna believe...

The North Koreans and the Syrians... or your lyin' eyes? -- BBC -- North Korea was helping Syria build a nuclear reactor, US officials are to tell lawmakers in a closed session.Unnamed officials told a number of US newspapers that the US had video footage of the Syrian facility with North Koreans inside.Syria has repeated denials that it has any nuclear weapons programme, or any such agreement...

More horrible, scary, sort of guns

-- GATINEAU, Que. -- For the first time in its history, a weapon was fired inside a courtroom at the Gatineau courthouse yesterday.Of course... it turns out that this was actually an air-gun... which would really only be classified as a weapon by, say... a squirrel being stalked by a 10 year-old...

Feelin' Geeky?

Drive away a new Ubuntu...The version has also been designed to make installation simpler and give users the chance to try the OS without making radical alterations to their current computer set-up."This is the first version that you can install under Windows."Instead of re-partitioning your hard drive and taking some fairly risky steps, effectively you can now install under Windows without modifying...

"When you care enough..."

"...to share the Scary Test."Once you've located the necessary e-mail addresses, ISIS invites you to choose one of six specially designed e-cards. Each one can be forwarded to up to six lovers, friends with benefits, or "tricks" to break the bad news as gently as possible. If you wish, you can make your greeting more medically specific by choosing your particular disease ("Chlamydia, Crabs & Scabies,...

The NDP starts making...

Some sort of sense... you know we're really in deep muck...The province will soon unveil a "comprehensive strategy" to unclog emergency rooms by reducing the number of patients who are taking up hospital beds when they can receive the needed care at home, Health Minister George Smitherman said today.Smitherman wouldn't provide any details, but promised the plan would look at adjusting the level of...

You're pissin' off the stripper lobby...

You must be doin' something right. -- OTTAWA -- The RCMP have beefed up security around Immigration Minister Diane Finley in response to threats from criminal groups that oppose her efforts to block foreign strippers from entering Canada, federal officials said yesterday.Officials said the extra security flows directly from Bill C-17, which would limit the number of work visas given to foreign...

It was June 6, 1944...

And all up and down the fearsome "Atlantic Wall"... Field Marshal Rommel's stunned troopers sat down in their trenches and cried... "Ach du liebe, Hans... are they allowed to do that?" -- DESERONTO, ON -- Many of the protesters, including spokesman Dan Doreen, were visibly upset after encountering such a strong show of manpower by OPP, whom Doreen said appeared to "want to fight."Doreen decried...