You, too... can be an uber-sophisticated...

...urban metro-sexual...**********RELATED: And what exactly is the deal......with the lunatic left crappin' all over the Je...

FROM THE COMMENTS:

"In Google's defense - the Delete and enter keys are awfully close together." -- [more Google fails] ...

Never a Community Organiser around...

...when you really need one... -- CHICAGO -- Nation of Islam leader Minister Louis Farrakhan predicted on Sunday that America faces imminent uprisings that mirror those in the Middle East.“What you are looking at in Tunisia, in Egypt … Libya, in Bahrain … what you see happening there … you’d better prepare because it will be coming to your door.”Of course, as has been readily apparent for some...

If you build it...

...they will surely come... -- ONTARIO -- The province’s auditor general found special diet payments, which give chronically ill welfare recipients extra cash to eat healthier, ballooned 1,200% in a six-year period. In a 2009 report, AG Jim McCarter said the welfare supplements went to $67 million in 2009 from only $5 million in 2003.**********RELATED: From our voluminous......"disposable people"...

GTA farmers, hunters and skeet shooters...

...dodge yet another bullet...One man is dead after a late night shooting located in the Sheppard Ave.-Neilson Rd. area Saturday. Two suspects were arrested a short distance from the shooting scene and are now in custody.The suspects are, as they say... known to police.**********RELATED: I'm from...

What's life without a dream, huh?

Tell me Dalton's gonna show his face... I'll walk barefoot over broken glass all the way from Hastings County...**********RELATED: Too many Liberals...The Ontario government paid nearly $16-million for the land, which was seized and occupied by protesters from the nearby Six Nations reserve almost...

Police, Fire & Paramedics rush to building...

...at 1 Yonge Street... as longhaired, hemp-clad bodies start to rain down from overcrowded window ledges...The survey — an exclusive Star poll of more than 6,000 Canadians - one of the largest samplings of public opinion in advance of a possible spring election — shows the Conservatives have built...

FROM THE COMMENTS:

"We, in the green movement, aspire to a cultural model in which killing a forest will be considered more contemptible and more criminal than the sale of 6-year-old children to Asian brothels."**********THE COMPASSIONATE, INTELLECTUAL LEFT REPLIES:"That has to be the stupidest, most vile thing you've...

"Hope, change and..."

...c'mon... it ain't about truth... it's about getting yourself elected...**********RELATED: Don't politicians just say......the darnedest things..."Libyan leader Colonel Gaddafi has threatened to 'burn all of Libya' if the citizens do not cease protests against hi...

Charlie Sheen of Middle East countries...

...tells United Nations to go piss up a rope... -- VIENNA (AP) -- Diplomats say Syria has evaded a request from the head of the U.N. atomic agency for access to a suspected nuclear site. -- You don't have to be a genius to figure out this dynamic... just ask the parents of any small child.Reward bad behaviour... at your peril.**********RELATED: In other Inconvenient Truth news"In Geneva, the...

Other "be careful what you wish for" news

I'm gonna go out on a limb here... and guess that ol' Mo wishes he could somehow climb down from all that "die a martyr" yip-yap..."Gadhafi's days are numbered," said Col. Hussein. "If we capture him, he will be publicly prosecuted for his crimes. But if the youth find him first, I don't think I'll see Gadhafi in less than 40 or 50 pieces."Hmmm... methinks the Arab Middle East may just need a few...

Don't mess with...

...wait a minute...In another e-mail to himself, titled “NICE TARGETS,” he listed two categories of targets: hydroelectric dams and nuclear power plants. On Feb. 6, 2011, the affidavit alleges, Aldawsari sent himself an e-mail titled “Tyrant’s House,” in which he listed the Dallas address for former President George W. Bush.Yup, it's inevitable... sooner or later, one of these gomers is gonna be...

It's a long-standing Liberal tradition...

...no sense waiting for Iggy to maybe pull outta that tailspin... newly emboldened Bobbo decides he's gonna fly a little closer to the sun...Nice to see that he's figured out who Canada's real enemies are...“People in public service are talking about this — not openly, because they’re all terrified....

From the folks who brought you...

...mandatory mercury-infused, foreign-made corkscrew lightbulbs... -- TORONTO -- There are 40 new wind, solar and water electricity projects on the way across Ontario.Energy Minister Brad Duguid said Thursday new contracts have been signed with 35 solar projects, four wind projects and one water projects.For the record, here at "the halls" we compost and recycle religiously. We heat with wood...

You haven't got a job... I guess it's nice to...

...have a hobby...Cigarettes, raw cut tobacco, weapons, cars, trucks and SUVs, snowmobiles, currency, drugs: You name it, it’s probably been smuggled into Canada at the crossing at the Seaway International Bridge, or as it was delicately renamed 11 years ago in recognition of the Akwesasne Mohawks, the Three Nations Bridge.But hey... this is Canada... it's much easier to go with CBC-inspired mythology,...

Those damned knuckle-draggin neocon...

...wait a minute...

You can almost smell the leadership

Is it just me... or did President McDreamy actually take a swifter, harder line... with Republican Governor Scott Walker? -- Washington, DC -- “We are reviewing a variety of options with our international partners to compel or to persuade the government of Libya to cease this terrible violence.”Okay, okay, settle down... what's the freakin' hurry here?It's not like people are being slaught......

Show me the honour

Almaleki's lawyers characterized the incident as a tragic series of mistakes that led to Noor's death. Almaleki admitted he drove toward Noor when he spotted her out with her boyfriend's mother, Amal Edan Khalaf, near a government office. He said he intended to spit on Khalaf when his daughter stepped...

Well, c'mon... what else ya gonna say...

...you're polling somewhere beyond the dark, hairy ass-end of "none of the above?"The Nanos Leadership Index score, an amalgam of questions on trust, competence and vision, has Mr. Ignatieff at 36.9, down from 45.1 in December. Stephane Dion was at the same level during the 2008 coalition crisis, when...

TRUTH...

OTTAWA - Prime Minister Stephen Harper’s call for opposition politicians to back his plan to crack down on human smuggling is being met with a flat ‘no’....OR CONSEQUENCES...“When the next boatload of illegals washes up on our shores, Canadians won’t forgive the Ignatieff Liberals for letting human smugglers treat our great country as their doormat.Of course, stuff like this is just S.O.P. for the...

In other "poor Somali fisherman" news...

(CBSNews) -- Updated 9:57 a.m. ET -- The four Americans aboard a yacht hijacked by pirates off the coast of Somalia are dead. CBS News national security correspondent David Martin reports that gunshots aboard the yacht were heard, and the warship took action, dispatching forces to board the Quest.How about we start to speak their language?"Bartender, give me a Somali Pirate.""How do you make that?""Just...

How do you say...

...totally & irrevocably disconnected from reality... in Spanish? -- CIUDAD JUAREZ, Mexico -- A shoot-em-up video game set in the border town of Ciudad Juarez has angered local officials... Chihuahua state legislators said Sunday they have asked federal authorities to ban "Call of Juarez: The...

You really wanna see the Pyramids, huh?

Just remember... as wonderful as it is, to perhaps see the ass-end of this particular Oligarchy... democracy may not be the only thing they're thirsting for..."More details have emerged of Lara Logan's terrifying ordeal at the hands of a frenzied mob." -- And hey... you've got daughters thinking of...

And hey, that guy reminds everybody...

...of Mr Spock's father on anti-depressants... how's he doing? -- What may matter most is that after weeks of Conservative television attack ads warning voters that the once-itinerant Liberal Leader “didn’t come back for you,” the share of voters who approve of Mr. Ignatieff’s leadership has slumped...

It's an open secret that ranks up there...

...with Hollywood's most egregious casting blunders... the man who makes Heath Ledger's crazy, scary Joker look like Beaver Cleaver at the breakfast table...And his motley crew of homicidal thugs are even scarier yet...At least some Libyan units have disgraced themselves, firing indiscriminately into...

Metropolitan Toronto farmers, hunters &...

...yes, skeet shooters... dodge yet another bullet... -- TORONTO -- Police have charged a 19-year-old man with first-degree murder in the shooting death of a man in a Toronto apartment building earlier this month.Aasif Patel surrendered to police Saturday and is scheduled to appear in court today....

Please tell me he wasn't high...

...at the time of this horrible accident... -- MONTREAL -- Quebec’s auto insurance protection agency has been ordered to pay $5,000 to a Quebec man so that he can grow and smoke marijuana in his home. That means paying $5,000 for a hydroponic greenhouse in the man’s home, as well as covering water, electricity, plants and soil expenses.The tribunal judges said this case was “special.”The man...

I guess they really didn't get...

...the unit... on bedside manner... -- TORONTO -- A postgraduate medical resident and a family physician were arrested Friday for allegedly drugging and sexually assaulting a 23-year-old woman at a downtown hotel.The victim met with the two men at a hotel bar on Queen St. W. and University Ave. Sunday, police said. The men said they would provide her with career advice.**********UPDATE: Take...

Time to call in the D-Boys

-- Feb. 19 (Bloomberg) -- Somali pirates hijacked a yacht with four U.S. passengers off the coast of Oman, U.S. Central Command said.U.S. Central Command is monitoring the situation, according to a spokesperson for the organization in Tampa, Florida, who declined to be identified.**********RELATED:...

Hail to the...

...Redistributor-in-Chief...By aligning himself closely with unions, Obama is siding with a core segment of the Democratic Party base - but one that has chafed in recent weeks as the president has sought to rebuild his image among centrist voters by reaching out to business leaders.Republicans see a chance to show that they're willing to make the tough choices to cut spending and to challenge the...

Never a long gun registry around...

...when you really, really need one...Police say Toronto residents Akins Fortune, 22, and Kibrom Tesfay, 18, are facing several charges, including attempted murder and aggravated assault.Fortune is also charged with disarming a peace officer and obstructing a peace officer.Meanwhile, an arrest warrant has been issued for a third suspect, 28-year-old Shaun Davis of Toronto.Davis is black, 5-foot-8,...

It's a bright, sunny day...

...the birds are birding... and I'm doing a little tractor shopping. Actually been mulling over picking up a used backhoe... but after further consideration and consultation with a farmer friend... a tractor (and its many attachments) just seems much more useful.Shouldn't have any trouble picking up...

With friends like this...

...who needs Republicans? - Another guest – who insisted Mr. Obama has “always been pretty centrist” – helpfully reminded that Mr. Obama “did go to church before he was a candidate for the presidency.” - That church, of course, was presided over by the racist, anti-American, hate-spewing Rev. Jeremiah Wrig...

Man... that's some "Religion of Peace"

I'd sure hate to see these guys when they're really pissed...The Bahrain capital of Manama was rocked by sporadic clashes, hours after riot police attacked a makeshift encampment of pro-reform protesters in the centre of the city, killing at least four and injuring dozens of others.An Al Jazeera correspondent, who cannot be named for security reasons, said on Thursday that "clashes were no longer...

From the folks who brought you...

...lead-painted baby toys...According to senior federal officials, an attack that first became public at Treasury Board earlier this month also hit elsewhere in the federal public service, including Finance. An investigation into the attack is focused on Chinese IP addresses. The officials also told The Globe and Mail that this isn’t the first time Ottawa has had to deal with this type of attack.Of...

"Flee, flee... run away!!!"

The Obama Whitehouse has yet another Monty Python moment..."Our position on Iran and the right of way is well known and I would refer you on that specifically to the State Department. I don't have anything for you on the ship in the Suez." -- Ah, yes... you can smell the leadership.Stand by for $2.00 a litre gasoli...

Victim of crime gets $500,000 compens...

...wait a minute... -- EDMONTON -- An inmate working at an Alberta prison farm is suing the Attorney-General of Canada for $500,000 after alleging he was badly injured by an "aggressive and dangerous" cow. Johnson alleges he was carrying out his farm duties when he was "aggressed" by the cow."Just spitballin' here... but I'm guessing Mr Johnson is forgetting that he didn't end up in the crowbar...

"Stop... or I'll yell stop again"

“To be responsible for the deaths of 52 people, serve four-and-a-half years and be released and to say that means he has paid his debt to society just beggars belief,” Mr. Foulkes told the Guardi...

This must be some of the gun nuts...

...that Toronto ex-Mayor David Miller warned us about..."It’s been an absolute incredible experience," he said of the Canada Winter Games. "There aren’t enough words to describe how phenomenal this experience has been."[mo...

I wonder what will be the first thing...

...those poor oppressed Egyptians are gonna do with their newfound... oh... my... gawd... -- (CBSNews) -- On Friday, Feb. 11, the day Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak stepped down, CBS chief foreign correspondent Lara Logan was covering the jubilation in Tahrir Square for a "60 Minutes" story when she and her team and their security were surrounded by a dangerous element amidst the celebration....

Things Go Better With...

...well, you know...

There was any real justice in the world...

...they'd toss this freak in with Clifford Olson... and weld the door shut... -- TORONTO -- A North York woman who shopped for a CD while her baby was dying of agonizing burns to 40% of his tiny body was found guilty Monday of manslaughter.Miguel Fernandes died of horrific injuries that were inflicted...

WAG THE DOG: Part 4634

Another fuzzy-bunny CBC poll goes horribly wrong..."Do you agree with the government's plan to reduce overall immigratio...

So... it's like a lateral transfer...

...within the company...While CTV always defended Fleischmann’s party work by saying he was a volunteer on a leave of absence, a blogger published e-mails showing Fleischmann using his work e-mail address to discuss how the Liberals should plan their TV advertising strate...

Dirty politicians... let them reap...

...as they sow... -- NOVA SCOTIA -- Kevin Lacey, Atlantic spokesman for the Canadian Taxpayers Federation, said anyone convicted of misusing taxpayers' money should lose their pensions."They shouldn't benefit from the taxpayer if they're convicted of abusing taxpayers' dollars," Lacey said.The federation calculated Hurlburt's pension at about $57,000, MacKinnon's at $47,000, and Wilson's at $42,000....

And Winston Churchill wept

It's truly over... over the...

Money for nuthin'... cheques for free

It's like those Nigerian email scams... if something sounds too good to be true... it usually ...

Just another reason...

...to vote Conservative..."When a citizen comes to deal with the government, particularly to exercise their right to vote, I think it's entirely reasonable that we say we need to confirm who you are and a facial identification is a reasonable way of doing that."**********THE COMPASSIONATE INTELLECTUAL...

What scary knuckle-dragging racist said...

"The fact is, Canada has an enviable culture based on Judeo-Christian values - not Muslim values - with British and French rule of law and traditions and that's why it's better than all of the other places in the world.""We are heading down a dangerous path if we allow the idea that sharia law has a place in Canada. It does not. It is completely incompatible with the idea and reality of Canada."""If...

Dear Globe & Mail... I anxiously await...

...your followup article about plastic strap-on penises...One of her biggest-selling novels, Frost Fair, is set in 1814 and tells the story of Gideon Frost, a printer and covert part-time prostitute who carries on a secret affair with a wealthy ruffian named Joshua Redfern.What women want, huh?Sure...

Never a long gun registry around...

...when you really need one...A man in his 20s became Toronto's 10th murder victim of the year — and the second to die en route to hospital in one day — after being shot in a Scarborough apartment building.Toronto Police responding to a shooting call found the victim with no signs of life in the lobby of 70 Stevenvale Dr., Scarborough, at 7:52 p.m.He was rushed to Sunnybrook hospital from the Lawrence...

Yeah... stability...

...that's one word...“I think this is something the international media has never paid much attention to," Davidson said. “But on the Arab street, this has been well known. With the Mubaraks, we’re talking about one of the richest families in the world. They control a very large empire of wealth that has been very carefully hoarded.”The average Egyptian has an income of about $6,000 a year, with almost...

I suppose Orwell was right...

...some animals are more equal than others...Under a province-wide policy, Ontario school boards must be more inclusive and accommodate different faiths during the school day. In one Waterloo, Ont. school, this means a room set aside with holy books and prayer mats for Muslims. Given the complaints that have greeted the presence of Christmas trees and disbursement of bibles in other schools, is there...

Scratch a socialist...

...find a frothing hypocrite...Mr. Moore has built an entire career - a vast personal industry - upon denouncing capitalism, the profit motive and “greedy” corporations. He is exhibiting the very behavior he claims to abhor. His lawsuit reveals that, despite his public image as a champion of the working class and the common man, he is a cynical, money-grubbing charlatan who worships the almighty buck.And...

Sucking AND blowing... that's why we...

...call him McSlippery...In the Spring of 2010, Ontario’s Progressive Conservatives called for a moratorium on the find-farm projects until an independent study on the environmental and health effects of the farms could be completed.On Friday, the Ontario Liberals quietly mothballed the project, citing...

A little unclear on the concept

Not to bum you out, Abdullah... but trading one oligarchy for another... still not democracy...In a statement read out on state television at midday on Friday, the military announced that it would lift a 30-year-old emergency law but only "as soon as the current circumstances end". -- Don't misread...

Never a long gun registry around...

...when you really need one...Police have identified a Toronto man fatally wounded after a shooting near Coronation Park early Friday.Police were called to 83 Clearview Heights, near Black Creek and Tretheway Drs., after shots rang out around 2 a.m.Gregory Taylor, 21, was found dead in the back of a car.Remember... taking rifles & shotguns off farmers, hunters & skeet shooters will immediately...

Bell’s vision is an Internet...

"...that’s more like your cellphone. Treat every new Internet application as a 'feature' that incurs a new monthly fee. Charge a 'termination fee' if you get sick of how things are going." "Above all, make everything consumers do cost more. It’s familiar territory for any cellphone owner, and it’s not a happy territory for consumers or the online econom...

Just something to think about...

...while you're signing that massive Miller-engineered municipal property tax cheque..."We have a revenue problem and a spending problem," the city's chief financial officer Cam Weldon sa...

Does anybody know if there's an actual...

...Arabic word for 'neutral'? -- CAIRO -- The Egyptian military has secretly detained hundreds and possibly thousands of suspected government opponents since mass protests against President Hosni Mubarak began, and at least some of these detainees have been tortured.The military has claimed to be neutral, merely keeping anti-Mubarak protesters and loyalists apart. But human rights campaigners...