-- "Peel Regional Police say a victim has died following a shooting near Goreway and Morning Star drives in Mississauga. No suspect information has been released." --And...
-- "Hamilton Police are searching for two vehicles following a late night shooting in the city’s downtown core." --No gun... no problem...
-- "Toronto Police say a man in his 20s was rushed to hospital after a stabbing near Simcoe and Adelaide streets in the downtown area early Saturday morning." --No knife... no problem...
-- "Toronto Police say a stolen vehicle struck a fence, flipped onto its side, injuring several occupants, who were later transported to the hospital with various injuries." --BONUS RIFF:" I fought the law and the law won...
-- "He has been identified as 59-year-old Daniel Tronko." --
