-- "Shoeless madman Jyrell Thomas, 25, was charged Thursday with murder for stabbing another straphanger to death in an unprovoked spurt of violence on a Queens train – as harrowing video of the bloody attack shows terrified riders scrambling off the subway car." --And you've gotta look out for the gals too, apparently.
-- "Prison gates across England and Wales had a party atmosphere on Thursday morning, with some convicts calling out thanks to Prime Minister Andy Burnham for having slashed their sentences." --
-- "'Four people have been arrested' in connection with a vehicle registration fraud scheme that has been linked to more than $100,000 in unpaid 407 tolls. The investigation, dubbed Project Octane, began in May 2026." --If you want their names, though... you have to go here...
-- "Haroon Qayumzada, 31, Gajan Karunanithy, 35, Tariq Hameed, 53, and Ismail Ismail, 37." --You want pictures... CityNews Toronto has 'em.
-- "Nakeem Jamar Johnson, 36, wanted for attempted murder, conspiracy to commit murder, along with multiple weapon and drug charges, was arrested in Cross Lake, a 'northern community' in Manitoba." --Define 'northern community'...
-- "There are individuals of non-aborginal origin, as well as a number of Metis residing on-reserve. The majority of the population is treaty status." ---- "Those gosh-darned 'Manitoba' men...
A Manitoba man accused of killing his three young children, their mother and a teenage relative has parted ways with his lawyers for the second time this year." --
-- "Toronto Police said when the victim opened the door to grab the package, they were rushed by three suspects, who forced their way into the unit. The suspects ransacked the apartment before fleeing with several luxury items." --But, wait there's more...
-- "Toronto Police are investigating after a vehicle damaged by gunfire was abandoned following a collision in Etobicoke early Thursday morning." --And more...
-- :A man was found suffering from a gunshot wound inside a home in Etobicoke early Thursday morning." --
-- "Christa Pike, Tennessee’s first woman to be executed in over 200 years is still alive after receiving two doses of a lethal injection — as her attorneys race to file an emergency stay." --AND THE POLS ARE PANICKING...
-- "Tennessee Gov. Bill Lee is pausing all executions this year after Christa Pike survived two deadly doses of pentobarbital." --And before you get all weepy...
-- "Pike was on death row for luring a romantic rival into a wooded area and torturing her with a box cutter – carving a pentagram into her chest – before smashing her head with a piece of asphalt, claiming a piece of the victim’s skull as a souvenir." --You think I'm kidding about Canada?
-- "Roshvin Crofton of Ajax is facing nearly a dozen charges in connection with an arson that damaged multiple homes last month." --
And it's not Roshvin's first rodeo.
Oops... here comes another one.
-- "Now the question starts to become: When do we resume some controlled increase in the population, which is the nature of Canada?" --Ladies... are you ready to embrace Sharia Law?
-- "A man died following a shooting near a busy downtown intersection during rush hour Tuesday afternoon, London, police say. A male suspect was arrested. The shooting death is the fifth homicide of the year in London." --
I guess Public Safety Minister hasn't put enough skeet shooters behind bars as needed.
UPDATE:
-- "Mohamed Abdel Aziz Soumahoro, 21, of Laval, Quebec, has been charged with second degree murder." --
-- "The investigation started when Toronto Police received a call for a person with a gun near The Esplanade and Lower Jarvis Street. Police tried to stop the car, but Kaleym, the driver of the vehicle, attempted to flee and struck one of the officers. SIU spokesperson Monica Hudon also told reporters that two firearms were recovered near the Mercedes." --
Now... does granny want guns off the street... or not?
And...
-- "Investigators determined the victim was killed Aug. 26, 2025 and was identified as Deuvane Donald Francis of Toronto. Daniel Fearon, 40, and Sherrie Donovan, 41, have been charged with first-degree murder." --
-- "One in 10 aboriginal children now lands in foster care, compared to one in 200 for non-aboriginal children, the AFN said. There are currently three times as many children in foster care as there were in residential schools." --
-- "The Omani copilot who stabbed his colleague piloting a FlyDubai Boeing 737 jet Wednesday has been arrested for trying to crash the packed passenger plane in a 'jihadist terrorist attack.' The pilot was arrested and is currently being questioned in Saudi Arabia." --
Think it doesn't happen here? Think again.
UPDATE... Yes, it's a mystery...
-- "FlyDubai confirmed Wednesday that AN ALTERCATION occurred on the flight deck of its Israel-bound flight before the aircraft diverted to Saudi Arabia, while cautioning that the reasons and motives behind the incident remain unknown." --UPDATE2...
-- "The injured pilot aboard the FlyDubai flight clicked the release to open the cockpit door while lying bloodied on the floor allowing others to gain access to the cockpit as the aircraft rapidly lost altitude." --The plane initially plummeted some 17,000 feet in under two minutes.
-- "'We are working in full partnership with First nations, with the Metis and the Inuit. As allies from the start, not at the end,' Carney said during the Liberal caucus planning meeting earlier in September." --
And how's that free speech at universities going?
-- "Investigators say the firearms were traced back to one individual who was registered to possess firearms and was allegedly acting as the supplier to two other sellers. The three suspects, Zhuohang Ma, 23, Jun Xiang Huang, 29, and Lie Le, 23, were arrested." --No gun... no problem,,,
-- "A man in his 50s has been injured following a stabbing in Scarborough, according to police." --
-- "Two Hamilton men, Abdulrahman Ali, 21, and Hussain Yahya Jawad, 23, are facing a series of charges after a violent daylight carjacking left a 62-year-old woman injured before police tracked down her stolen vehicle." --And there's this.
-- "The notice said the straws will 'reduce harm by lowering the risks of cuts or tears inside the nose,' reduce the risk of blood-borne infections spreading and 'provide a safer option for snorting,' recognizing that overdose and toxicity risk remain." --WARNING...This is not the Babylon Bee...
-- "In just a little more than a week, the Parole Board of Canada granted to two B.C. men jailed for murdering children temporary passes to leave prison." --
-- "Disturbing video shows a Hamas fighter using a young child as a human shield to transfer weapons into a civilian home in Gaza during Israeli operations in the territory. The aerial footage, taken from an Israeli drone, was shared by the Israel Defense Forces to show the twisted methods the Palestinian terror group is using to prevent Israeli air strikes." --Meanwhile... back in Chuckie Buggerlugs Commonwealth.
-- "Emonnie Branch, 51, the suspect in the fatal shooting of Kentucky State Police Trooper Hayden Phillips was arrested Monday afternoon in Louisville. Phillips, 30, is survived by his wife, their three children and his parents." --
-- "Durham Regional Police are searching for 23-year-old Yaseen Waggan, of Ajax. after a Tesla SUV struck two officers during an investigation in Oshawa. Waggan was under conditions prohibiting him from driving and requiring him to remain at his residence overnight. Officers also found a replica firearm and drugs inside that vehicle." --And there's this.
-- "Satinderjeet Singh, 32, also known as Goldy Brar, was added to the FBI's Ten Most Wanted Fugitives list on September 28, 2026, with a reward of up to US $1 million offered for information leading to his arrest. Brar was charged back in July for the 2023 assassination of Sikh activist Hardeep Singh Nijjar in Surrey, B.C." --Nota bene... Brar came to Canada in 2017 via Canada's student visa program.
-- "Three people are injured, one critically, after a two-car crash just before 12:10 p.m. at Lawrence and Victoria Park avenues in Scarborough. The circumstances surrounding the collision are unknown at this time." --Scarborough... no gun... no problem.
-- "A senior member of Congo’s ruling party was beaten to death on Sunday in Butembo, North Kivu province after taking part in a radio programme to raise awareness about the Ebola outbreak. The attackers beat him, looted his belongings and set his house on fire." --Nota bene...
-- "The incident is the latest in a series of attacks on Ebola response teams, underscoring persistent mistrust among the population. The mayor of Butembo did not immediately respond to a request for comment." --Nota bene... what's up with all the murdering stuff?
-- "Authorities in Congo restricted funeral wakes and banned gatherings of more than 50 people to control a fast-moving Ebola outbreak." --
-- "'I am very aware of the levels of speculation about the motivation behind this incident, and the geopolitical questions that are being raised. However, I ask that at this time, Counter Terrorism Policing are given the space to work carefully and clearly,' says Deputy Assistant Commissioner Vicki Evans." --
UPDATE: We don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, right?
-- "The five were initially detained under the Explosives Act and on suspicion of preparing a terrorist act. Head of Counter Terrorism Policing Assistant Commissioner Laurence Taylor confirmed their release on bail." --
Authorities have not formally linked the suspects to a foreign state or confirmed a specific motive.
Join the discussion...
-- "Lmao. What even is this country anymore? Throw a plastic bottle at police? Two years in prison! Suspected terrorist? Awww poor baby, bail for you." --
-- "Toronto Police are investigating a shooting after a man walked into a hospital with a gunshot wound early Monday morning. It is unclear where the shooting took place and investigators have not released any information on possible suspects." --
Why is refusing to talk to the police not relevant to the reporting?
And there's this...
-- "Toronto Police are investigating after the victim of a stabbing was found lying on the road in Scarborough." --
-- "Palestinian terrorist Saher Nidal Latfi Sakr, who kidnapped then 25 year-old Noa Argamani during the Oct. 7, 2023 attack, has been killed by Israel's undercover Unit 33. Harrowing footage shows Argamani desperately yelling for her boyfriend as Sakr drove away with her on a motorcycle." --
-- "Toronto Police have identified 30-year-old Mohamud Kheyre as the second of two people whose bodies were discovered inside separate burned-out vehicles at opposite ends of the city last week." --Kheyre, Kheyre... that sounds so familiar...
-- Brampton was the last known address for alleged killer Mohamud Kheyre, who police say is on the lam and may have fled the country. Kheyre is accused of killing 17-year-old Sharmarke Farah." --
It's enough to make a fella believe in karma.
-- "Mass shootings in Johannesburg and Cape Town, the nation’s largest cities, is the latest horrifying violence in the Rainbow Nation, which has one of the highest murder rates in the world. The two mass shootings come less than a week after an attack on a house party, killing 11 people including a pregnant woman." --
Roughly 60 people are killed every day in South Africa, a country of 62 million people.
Detroit 'home business' working hard to catch up...
-- "'This was an after-hours location,' Detroit Police Chief Todd Bettison said of the shooting scene. 'Imagine a strip club. … I'll leave it at that.'" --And there's this.
-- "Meir Cohen, 46, of Toronto is facing a second-degree murder charge after an unnamed man in his 50s was fatally stabbed at an apartment building on Tangreen Court near Steeles Avenue and Yonge Street in North York on Saturday night." --
UPDATE: The deceased is 57-year-old Albert Gundran, a member of the Vaughan Filipino community.
-- "Condemned Tennessee killer, Christa Gail Pike, 50, the first woman sentenced to death in the state in 200 years — is demanding an all-female lethal injection team to carry out her execution, claiming she could be traumatized by having men involved in her final moments." --
Of course, that trauma didn't stop Pile from brutally murdering 19-year-old Colleen Slemmer by beating her, slashing her throat and carving satanic symbols into her body.
Meanwhile... back at the ranch.
-- "Five men have been arrested and remain in custody as Counter-Terror Police cinduct an investigation into a major incident near RAF Fairford. Authorities did not name the suspects or give details as to their nationality. Counter Terrorism are 'working closely" with partners to understand the circumstances of the incident.'" --NOTA BENE... no more crazy talk about the Mennonites, pleads Brit PM...
-- "Prime Minister Andy Burnham has urged people not to speculate after five men were arrested on suspicion of terrorism and explosives offences." --
Iran's Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps has declared RAF Fairford in Gloucestershire to be a 'legitimate target.'
The only saving grace is that these muppets were dumber than a bag of hand grenades.
