23 November 2012

Don't worry... be Democrat

The recent re-infection of scrutonium into the body politic has been a harrowing turn of fortune for Axlerod and his scientific team. In November 2008, they had declared scrutonium "all but extinct," although they kept small amounts of the strain for use in laboratory experiments with Republican tax returns. It was thought to be in containment as recently as five weeks ago, with scientists citing poll results showing resistance to doses of unemployment previously considered fatal.

All that changed on September 12 after an unexpected outbreak in Benghazi, Libya. Although it caught Axlerod and his team by surprise, they were temporarily able to keep it under control with a regimen of YouTube blame therapy and gaffe-meme injections. But the new Benghazi strain proved stubbornly resistant, and has continued to slowly spread.

"We're dealing with the ultimate buzzkiller here," said Senior Narrative Engineer Stephanie Cutter. "This one directly attacks voters' ability to hallucinate happy thoughts, or even ignore the obvious - no matter how many squirrels we innoculate them with."


8 comments:

Al the Fish said...

And too many politicians lack the scrotumium (rock hard ball sack) to fight the good fight. Yeah, I`m looking at you Mittens.

Frances said...

Neo - OTT but are you okay? You've been so silent lately.

Neo Conservative said...

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just taking a wee break... thx.

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Anonymous said...

Quit scaring us lerkers!
Get back to posting!

Phew.
Glad ot hear you're okay.
Merry Xmas to you and yours.

James Higham said...

Doesn't it make you itch to be over there?

Frances said...

Belated Merry Christmas & a Happy New Year to you, Mrs Neo, and the Neophytes.

Anonymous said...

Welcome back Neo...love your style!

bluetech

Neo Conservative said...

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thx for the kind words... nice to be back.

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