C'mon, really... what did you think...

Apart from funding sex-change operations... Dalton was gonna do with that OHIP tax surcharge?

-- QUEENS PARK -- Thousands of Toronto welfare recipients could soon be able to cash in on their belly bulge.

While it would be certain to cost the province millions, the McGuinty government says it will consider the controversial proposal to redefine the obesity boundaries. Welfare recipients with a body mass index (BMI) above 40 currently get a special diet allowance of $20 a month.

Under the plan, the $20 monthly allowance would expand by more than 150% to nearly $51.

The number of Toronto welfare recipients collecting the meal ticket has grown by at least 20% since 2005, despite a supposed provincial clampdown.

About 31,000 social assistance recipients (those on both the Ontario Works and the Ontario Disability Support programs) were cashing in on the special diet allowance in August last year.

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RELATED: Baby Angelica-Leslie update

Looks like Ontario taxpayers, again courtesy of Premier McSlippery, were paying the shot here, too...

-- TORONTO -- The disturbing tale of a baby girl found abandoned in a freezing north Toronto stairwell four months ago took a further grim twist yesterday as police announced the arrest of her biological parents on multiple charges of child neglect and assault.

Both aged 30 and unemployed, the pair were married about six years ago and had moved to Kitchener last month, Detective Keith Moxley told a news conference.

During the couple's brief court appearance later in the day, it was learned they have three other young children, all of whom have been in the care of the Children's Aid Society since their parents were arrested Wednesday night.

Asked if he understood the charges, the father nodded. But his wife, who appeared to be pregnant, seemed confused, telling the court she did not want legal representation from duty counsel Brad Bechard, and that "I don't know what the procedures are."

*

Whaddaya mean fight back?

That's so un-Canadian.

City council is moving to stem the flow of development dollars from the community by hitting native protesters with an injunction that includes a request for $110 million in damages.

But the city of Brantford has decided not to take it anymore.

Mayor Mike Hancock said Wednesday that council started a court action against the Haudenosaunee Development Institute, protesters Floyd and Ruby Montour and other individuals.

"We, as a council, felt we had no option, given the damage being done to the city and the reputation of the city," said Hancock.

Of course, if the provincial government was the least bit interested in upholding the law of the land, it wouldn't have come to this point.

The mayor said the economic impact of the protests and work stoppages is comparable to the city's loss of the Massey farm equipment manufacturing plant in the 1980s.

"It could take 10 years to recover from what's been done already."

So, yet another stand... against fuzzy-bunny political correctness.

Twice in one day... "be still my heart."

*

There must be a rip...

In the space-time continuum...

-- QUEBEC -- Quebec Premier Jean Charest rejected a key symbolic recommendation of the much-anticipated report on the integration of immigrants Thursday, a sign that the accommodation of religious minorities is still a matter of contention in the province.

The recommendation called for the removal of the crucifix from the National Assembly in a bid to reassure religious minorities of the secularity of the legislature.

Looks like the forces of political correctness are taking a smack in the teeth.

Mr. Charest immediately tabled a motion reaffirming Quebec's attachment to its Catholic heritage and pledging to keep the crucifix that hangs over the chair of the legislature's president. The motion was adopted unanimously.

“We can't erase our history,” Mr. Charest said. “The motion speaks to our history and the strong presence of the Catholic Church.”

*

He's not a criminal...

He's just another victim of our horrible rule obsessed society...

-- MONTREAL -- A former chef who goes by the nickname “Big Mike” has had his sentence for drug trafficking reduced because the provincial jail where he's incarcerated can't deal with his 430-pound weight.

And it's just not fair that we aren't bending over backwards to accommodate his unique personality and needs.

“He's only 37 years old but now his health situation has deteriorated to the point that now he has to walk with a cane,” Mr. Monterosso said. “He's been asking for a better diet but of course they refused that to him, telling him he's in jail, he's not in a hotel and there's only one menu.”

Mr. Monterosso said the problem accommodating special-needs convicts is particular to Quebec provincial jails and Mr. Lapointe would get better treatment in a federal prison.

Apparently there's no such thing as a bad boy anymore.

Introducing special-needs convicts.

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RELATED: How would we get along...

Without all those smooth-talkin' defense lawyers?

A jury now deciding whether Josh Mfizi transformed a straight-A high school student into a high-end call girl never heard that the accused faces six pimping-related charges in Alberta, including a similar procuring charge.

A national warrant was issued by Edmonton Police Services for 27-year-old Mfizi, also described in court documents as an associate of both the West End Jamaicans and the Get The Cash criminal networks. Both organizations operate within the Edmonton area.

Defence lawyer Michael Webster said in an interview yesterday the information kept from the jury would have violated his client's fair trial rights. He argued in court that the smart, manipulative teen is lying and she wanted to become a prostitute and lived in a relationship with Mfizi.

*

For the love of crazy people

Apparently Canada isn't the only country... with these wacky Human Rights Commissions...

His name is Matthew, he is 26 years old, and his supporters hope to take his case to the European Court of Human Rights.

But he won't be able to give evidence on his own behalf - since he is a chimpanzee.

Don't expect the court to be injecting a note of sanity here... they're gonna go with a very literal interpretation of the law.

In dismissing the activists' request to get a guardian for Matthew, a lower court ruled that the chimp was neither mentally impaired nor in danger - the legal grounds required for a guardian to be appointed.

It did not directly address the issue of whether a chimpanzee can be considered a person.

Well, thank goodness for that... I'm not sure I'm ready for the inevitable tumultuous debate on the pros and cons of "same-species marriage."

(h/t reader rich)

What kind of sick freaks...

Throw a baby down a stairwell in the middle of winter?

Well... thanks to Ontario's fuzzy-bunny, hug-a-thug legal system, you're never gonna know their names... but at least they've been arrested.

At just about eight-months of age she was left in a frozen stairwell at a North York plaza and now, nearly four months later, police say they've arrested two people in connection to the abandonment of the youngster known as "Baby Angelica-Leslie".

Sterilise these two... then lock them up.

**********

RELATED: And while we're at it...

How about a little electroshock therapy for this guy?

The random attack occurred Wednesday around 6 a.m. at College Station, police say. A 46-year-old man was standing on the subway platform waiting for a train when he was suddenly pushed from behind by a stranger down onto the tracks.

Of course... what we'll actually get... is a plea for more social workers.

*

More Islamic 'Crush, Kill, Destroy'

Over stupid Koran shooting incident.

-- KABUL -- Officials say a NATO soldier and two Afghan civilians have been killed in a protest over the shooting of the Koran by a U.S. sniper in Iraq.

NATO spokesman Major Martin O'Donnell said the alliance soldier was hit by gunfire, and it is not clear who had fired. He said the two civilians were killed when police opened fire on protesters.

Only three dead?

And you call yourselves a "bloodthirsty jihadi mob?"

Paaah... lightweights.

*

Something tells me...

Ol' Marty's major malfunction has absolutely nothing to do with insects...

"He said he developed a phobia about flies, cannot sleep, is irritable and his sex life has suffered."

To be scrupulously fair, Mrs. Neo points out the possibility... that Mr. Mustapha may originally be from one of those totally bug-free countries... and thus hyper-sensitised.

**********

FROM THE COMMENTS:

Verdict is in. SCC says "get stuffed."

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LAST WORD: Marty... better refill that prescription

"The appeal court also ordered Mustapha to pay Culligan’s legal costs of roughly $30,000 to that point. He will also be hit with the bill for legal costs at the Supreme Court under the standard “loser pays” rule that applies to most such cases in Canada."

*

TOTAL EQUALITY NOW

I'm thinkin' these womyn just aren't going far enough. How about, no more silly half-measures like separating all sports events by way of gender?

And never mind ski-jumping... let's start with the NFL.

Integrate or abolish.

**********

RELATED: Hey, it's Canada, let's just make shit up

The aboriginals will turn him into a hero... and nobody else will care enough to dispute it.

**********

LAST WORD: Save us... "oh caring, compassionate liberals"

"The senate exists to protect the electorate from itself when they make major mistakes (e.g. electing Harper). I do not trust the ignorant masses to tie their shoes nevermind elect senators."

*

The first thing ya know...

Ol' Jed's a millionaire...

J. Stephen Simon, executive vice president of Exxon Mobil Corp., said profits have been huge “in absolute terms” but must be viewed in the context of the massive scale of the industry.”

He asked Mr. Simon what his total compensation was at Exxon, a company that made $40-billion last year. Mr. Simon replied it was $12.5-million annually.

Sen. Arlen Specter, R-Pa., said Exxon's annual profits increased from $11.5-billion to $40.6-billion in the past five years and there was no explanation for “why profits have gone up so high when the consumer is suffering so much.”

*

"If the UN is an institution...

"...where principle must be left at the door, where the only way to gain advancement is to toe a party line dictated by Muslim dictatorships, where our Western allies are fodder for committees and agencies dominated by rogue states … then maybe the question isn’t why we aren’t more popular at the UN." "

"It’s why we’re a member there at all."

*

So... tell me again

How Toronto is such a wonderful place to live...

A woman was rushed to hospital last night after being brutally stabbed in a random attack in Toronto.

At around 8:30 p.m., Nicole McDonald, 26, was stabbed several times in the arm and abdomen in what Toronto Police describe as a random attack by a man while waiting at a bus stop near the busy intersection of Broadview St. and Danforth Ave.

I'm just waiting for Mayor Miller to make the obligatory call for more miracle, er... social workers.

Samad Dabiri, 47, of Toronto, was arrested near the scene and faces several charges in relation to the attack, including attempted murder.

Dabiri - a landed immigrant from Iran who has been in Canada for 11 years - was previously convicted of a similar random attack with a knife at Dufferin Mall in 2003.

So... unless your first "assault with a deadly weapon" in Toronto is now deductible... can someone tell me why Samad Scissorhands wasn't slumped in a cool, dark cell somewhere in Crazyland... so pilled-up, the staff could use him for a doorstop?

Or, better yet... on a plane back to Iran?

**********

FROM THE COMMENTS:

"Samid's inability to control his temper goes back much further: He had also been accused of uttering a death threat and carrying a weapon, a knife and a steel pipe, in 1999, but the charges were dropped."

P.S. -- That's funny... the Toronto 'Red' Star somehow fails to mention the two other attempts to slice & dice his fellow Torontonians.

**********

UPDATE: Cops weren't even notified

Det. Laing said Immigration Canada officials are following the case closely. Asked if Mr. Dabiri, a former Iranian police officer who came to Canada in 1996, should be deported, Det. Laing said: "I would drive him to the airport."

**********

RELATED: Meanwhile, in the badlands of Scarberia...

A 22-year-old man suffered a minor gunshot wound to the chest when he allegedly drove his rented car at a York Regional Police narcotics officer who was trying to arrest the motorist in Scarborough yesterday.

The alleged incident is similar to how York Det.-Const. Robert Plunkett was killed during an arrest last year. The 22-year veteran was was killed while trying to arrest an accused car thief in Markham last Aug. 2.

*

The thing is, Johnny...

I'm beginning to suspect... that sparkin' up a shitload of dope... may not actually "make you smarter."

*

Well, I know my wallet...

Is about forty dollars cleaner.

Had to go get one of my vehicles drive-cleaned this morning. As usual, despite being a 15 year-old high-miler SUV... it came back cleaner than a shark's tooth.

I guess Dalton's smiling though... because he apparently pockets almost 75% of that fee. The garage where I got it done says they make about eleven dollars a pop on these things... a far cry from the 60 bucks an hour they could make if that drive bay was available for general repairs.

Now, being the suspicious character that I am... I went to the Drive Clean website and found...

"How will I know if the test results and repairs are fair?"

"First, to be accredited, Drive Clean facilities have computerized, tamper proof equipment approved for the Drive Clean program, and staff that are certified for emissions testing and/or repairs."

Now, that's funny... like so many of the government's iron-clad assurances... this one seems a little over the top.

A buddy of mine, whose son-in-law is in the business... tells him that some entrepreneurs down in Scarberia have found a way around the skimpy profit margin thing.

For an extra twenty or thirty bucks, you can go to one of the many hole-in-the-wall car dealerships that blot out the Scarborough landscape and they'll run their shill car through the machine with your VIN number. Apparently, you can also do stuff like pour a litre of ethanol into the tank and fool with the timing, or have the garage duct tape an extra catalytic converter to the exhaust pipe to achieve a pass.

I also heard that the McGuinty government collects over 50 million dollars a year from the program, so don't expect it to end anytime soon.

Anyway... best not to dwell on the bad stuff. I'm done for a while.

**********

RELATED: Promises, promises... Dalton's "green world"

Ontario won't shut down its worst polluting power plant as early as it planned because it still needs the power the old, coal-fired generator produces.

The province's coal-fired plants cause up to 668 premature deaths, 928 hospital admissions and 1,100 emergency room visits each year, an analysis released in April said.

The Nanticoke announcement may add to the image of Ontario Premier Dalton McGuinty as a promise-breaker. His Liberal government budget last year broke a pledge not to raise taxes.

*

No Sugar Tonight...

Love the pejorative term used here... but I'm guessing the teams with the Customs & Immigration raid jackets weren't having much success.

-- OTTAWA -- The Harper government is deploying ***clandestine teams*** to fan out across foreign countries and gather raw information about elaborately staged phony weddings aimed at duping Canadian immigration officials.

The teams, which comprise up to five people, are part of a wider bid by the Department of Citizenship and Immigration to crack down on marriages of convenience as immigrant communities warn that thousands of foreign fraudsters are leaving lonely Canadians broke and broken-hearted.

Clandestine teams, huh?

Kinda conjures up images of... oh, i dunno... "soldiers with guns"... "in our streets."

**********

RELATED: Investigating? Those damn neocons, huh?

A Brampton woman charged with conspiracy in the murder of her Canadian ex-boyfriend in India brought her brother – also charged in the murder – to Canada with the aid of a fake passport, an assumed name and a fraudulent marriage, Indian police are alleging.

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LAST WORD: Sounds stupid... but it worked

When Canadian immigration officials in New Delhi began to notice the same guests appearing in photos of different weddings submitted as evidence for sponsoring overseas brides and grooms to Canada, an alarm went off.

"At a price, you could get packaged services with a wedding ceremony where people stand in as guests and relatives, posing for photos as in a real marriage."

*

Adding up the numbers

And guess who comes out on top...

Short... Sweet... Simple

"I've got a three-word action plan when it comes to the CHRC: Fire. Them. All."

**********

RELATED: Britannia drools...

"In case anyone is still not connecting the dots: In England, the police can now decide if your speech is abusive or insulting - whatever the hell that means, confiscate your property and issue you a court summons."

*

You think you're discouraged?

Try imagine how the cops and the crown attorneys must feel...

Cases in adult criminal courts are taking longer to complete. In 2006/2007, it took on average eight months to dispose of a case in adult court. This was considerably longer than the average of six months five years earlier.

Longer times to complete cases may be in part due to an increase in the proportion of cases involving multiple charges. Cases involving multiple charges represented 60% of the adult caseload in 2006/2007, compared with 57% five years earlier and 53% a decade earlier.

Think Paul Bernardo. After that video tape surfaced, it should have been all over. Think Willy Pickton and the eyewitness testimony and the various piles of body parts.

There's gotta be a way to streamline this mess.

**********

RELATED: And... speaking of messes

Another child-welfare agency in Manitoba is under review following allegations of questionable financial practices, the provincial government revealed Thursday.

The Cree Nation Child and Family Caring Agency has been under review since last 2007, but Family Services Minister Gord Mackintosh only made it public Thursday.

*

The fatal crash...

"Follows a long holiday weekend in which nine people lost their lives on Ontario roads and waterways."

Now, that's nine in Ontario alone... whaddaya figure the total was... all across Canada?

*

Fierce debate, huh?

Well then, thank goodness people in Quebec are so open-minded about this kind of thing...

A Montreal English-language newspaper has sparked fierce debate over what it says are leaked portions of a report from Quebec's commission on the reasonable accommodation of immigrants.

So, what sort of things are up for debate?

According to articles in the Montreal Gazette published over the weekend, chapters of the final report of the Consultation Commission on Accommodation Practices Related to Cultural Differences recommend Quebec francophones open their minds, get informed and learn more English.

Yup... excuse me... while I go get my debating helmet.

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RELATED: Speaking of "opening things up"

"The federal Conservative Party of Canada, like the two major parties in the U.S., will put some bloggers on the same footing as the mainstream media for their fall policy convention."

(via natnews)