France returns the favour...

...turns the Normandy invasion back around at Britain.

And yet, I'm not...

...not even a little...

"You'd be surprised how many of them are vegan."

They could've had an astronaut...

...but no, they went with the space cadet...

Perhaps dumpster diving for "star" candidates does have a downside.

TORONTO — Conservative defector Eve Adams failed on Sunday in her bid to run as a Liberal candidate in the looming federal election.

The sitting member of Parliament, welcomed personally into the fold by Liberal Leader Justin Trudeau, was handily beaten for the party’s nomination in the Toronto riding of Eglinton-Lawrence by lawyer Marco Mendicino.

I guess Justin is so used to living on the dark side he couldn't discern Ms. Adam's deeply flawed character. He was able to ignore both the car wash incident and the sign-stealing mess.

Truth is, even Steffi Mouthmarbles would have stepped around this political punji pit.

At a guess, a search of Ms. Adams’s soul could be conducted in the course of your average smoke break, if not between cigarettes. Yet Mr. Trudeau professed to be delighted with his new recruit, as untroubled by her serial loyalties as by the voluminous baggage she brings.

I can't wait to see what Eve Adams, neophyte Green Party candidate has to say about Pierre Lite.

Remember, Shiny Pony... if they'll do it with you... they'll do it to you.

You could abolish gender entirely...

...and some folks still wouldn't be satisfied..."Let's face it... if you can't get along with the Lotus Land Liberal Party (the folks who provide government subsidised heroin to the largest aggregate junkie population in North America) will you ever be able to find inner peace?

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RELATED: Turning Chicks with Dicks...

...into the new Mary Tyler Moore...

The series opens with an episode so nuanced and thoughtful, so quietly moving and genuine, it's almost impossible to believe it is made by many of the same people who helped build a family empire off the infamy of a young woman's sex tape.

Nope, not seeing it... what exactly is "nuanced" about a surgically fabricated woman... WITH A PENIS?

Of course it's being done by the same media whores who saturated the airwaves with Kardashian non-events. And please, let's not pretend this appeals to the higher intellect.

Perhaps, at some point, Bruce/Caitlyn will auction off his penis onscreen and blossom into full womanhood. This is all about monetising an increasingly popular surgical fetish... not that there's anything wrong with that.

But seriously, how exactly is this any different from freeing your inner Romulan, Klingon or Vulcan?

Live long and prosper Brucie.

The Official Snugli of Seal Team 6

...fashion accessories for the new millenium...Just because you're a sensitive new age dad doesn't mean you can't jock up like your Hollywood heroes.

Need a place to stow rocks for your next anti-poverty riot? No problemo.

Four years ago I asked...

"If every Canadian Senator who ever drooled between two lips... disappeared from the face of the earth tomorrow... how exactly would your life be affected?"

Whatever the original founders intentions may have been (and, given the Family Compactish elasticity of conscience back then, I'm not so sure they were actually that admirable in the first place) the Canadian Senate has become a luxury retirement home for political bagmen and water carriers of all stripes. It's a golden handshake for the filthy-souled much-moneyed faithful and a lucrative landing field for failed political aspirants.

So, is it actually time for a life-saving amputation?

**********

UPDATE: Misled by the media, yet again.

Unfortunately, this story turned out to be more Ferguson type fertilizer...

John Ivison is a master of satiating the narrative appetites of the moment, which is why he never seems to suffer any professional consequence for spreading the words of chronically wrong sources. The only true consequences, as usual, will be borne by a cynical public who are increasingly justified in believing little of what they read.

Hopes dashed, once more.

So, if Canadians elect Tommy Trotsky...

...does this mean we all get concealed carry permits?

"Gun production has more than doubled over the course of the Obama administration, according to a new report from the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives."

Food for thought.

Wynne's slavish devotion to Daltonomics...

...continues pushing Ontario into the red...

OTTAWA - Canada's federal finances are in a solid long-term position but the provincial and municipal government picture is far less rosy, the country's Parliamentary Budget Officer said on Tuesday.

California, here we come.

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RELATED: Small town cheap

To put it in terms...

...today's low information social justice warriors can understand... it ain't Barack or John Kerry who's wearing the strap-on here...

Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, the highest authority in Iran, told supporters on Saturday that U.S. policies in the region were "180 degrees" opposed to Iran's, in a Tehran speech punctuated by chants of "Death to America" and "Death to Israel".

Apparently, Secretary of State Kerry finds this development, "very troubling."

Oh, c'mon... it's not like we're talking nuclear bom... wait a minute.

Or you could keep it simple...

...just pay a hooker and make sure you glove up...

"It was only matter of time before a mobile phone app was launched that lets people say yes to sex. The app is designed to make sure there’s no trouble between partners the morning after the night before, as they film themselves giving consent."

Now, this is just dinosaur me, but, here's a thought... if you feel the need to set up a contractual video agreement to avoid getting arrested for rape... maybe that should raise a red flag or three.

Or, you could maybe try actual dating with someone you actually KNOW, LIKE and TRUST? Just sayin'.

**********

RELATED: Untruth AND Consequences

Honestly, hon... that must be some other Rodney Q. Bartleson.

Looks like the whole Metrosexual-Hooking-Up-O-Sphere is in for a few sleep-with-one-eye-open nights.

BIG SOCIALISM: They'd like to buy...

...the world a coke...

Neither Trudeau nor Mulcair were willing to address one of the thornier of current native issues: the insistence by the Mohawk community of Kahnawake, near Montreal, that non-natives who marry Mohawks be driven from the reserve.

Apparently, Tommy Trotsky and the Ghost of Pierre just wanna rock like it's 1939...

Mulcair simply dodged the question, twice, while Trudeau replied: “We need to make sure that we’re working together so that situations like this don’t come up and cause the friction and uncertainty that far too many people are living right now.”

Oh, c'mon Justin... what's a little ethnic cleansing among friends? Maybe you need to ask yourself, "What would that uber-efficient Chinese dictatorship do?"

Also... you're gonna need a bigger boat, er... cereal box to accomodate all 60 native tongues...

AFN national chief Perry Bellegarde called for all indigenous tongues in Canada to be declared official languages with similar status to French and English.

Sure that'd solve everything.

Hey, here's a thought. Let's combat misogyny by implementing mandatory breast implant surgery for Canadian men... so they can be more like that "courageous" Bruce Jenner.

Rioting tonight in Erie, Pennsylvania?

No, I don't think so. The people in Erie seem to instinctively know that looting and burning the city they live in won't bring back this fine young man.

I just don't understand why the national media thinks the deaths of Michael Brown and Freddie Gray are more important than the murder of Jacob Pushinsky.

Inexplicably, the Superintendent of Erie's Public Schools is framing the shooter as the "victim" in this tragedy. No killer left behind, it seems.

Just another story you won't see on the CBC.

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RELATED: Sorry, Mr President...

...he was "documented" extensively...

The man accused of shooting a young woman dead on a popular pier had served 181 months in federal prisons and been deported five times. But San Francisco’s sheriff saw fit to free him.

Feeling safer yet?

Dr Hope'N'Changelove

Uh, Barack, you're not listening... that's precisely what we're so afraid of...Yes, God Willing... or Inshallah as they say down at the mosque.

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RELATED: Keepin' it real

You can tell a lot about a president by the people he pardons.

Full Metal Prada

A century of Parris Island tradition goes all Semper Fifi... the end times can't be too far behind.

No matter that abilities improved and scores went up... female commander gets the boot for being too tough on her marines.

A Marine officer who led the service's only all-female recruit battalion was fired amid complaints of a toxic leadership environment — but her supporters say she was only trying to make the unit better by holding women to tougher standards.

Well, heck... you wouldn't want anybody to break a nail, right? It's not like we're looking to turn these ladies into lean, mean fight... hey, wait a minute.

Affirmative action... making all our lives better by dumbing down standards.

I can't wait for the NFL to start playing two-handed touch.

**********

RELATED: I guess he really, really misses...

...not having that son...

With Monday’s announcement, Obama has commuted more sentences than any president since Lyndon B. Johnson.

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LAST WORD: President McDreamy's "diplomatic landmark"

Today, in the announcement of a nuclear deal with Iran that ignores the plight of these three hostages, the Obama administration has left behind a Christian preacher, a journalist, and a U.S. Marine.

Hope and change, right Big Guy?

Victimhood Inc.

Yet again... nuclear level social fallout from the "soft bigotry of low expectations"...

"Twenty-five years later, I expected to find a feel-good story of progress and success in Kanesatake. Instead I found a community struggling with poverty, lawlessness and bitterness."

"Ottawa says it spent $35-million to buy 177 properties in the area. Locals claim that members of the band simply grabbed houses at random. They live there with no certificates of possession and they pay no rent."

No wonder Canada's aboriginal hierarchy live in fear of federal audits. But wait, it gets better...

The band council discourages members from voting in provincial or federal elections. Its economy is driven by cigarette and alcohol sales, and gambling operations outside governments deem illegal but have been powerless to stop.

Honestly, this sounds less like an intentional community than an off-Broadway production of Grand Theft Auto V...

A community survey found the richest six per cent of the population made as much money as the bottom 50 per cent. And because taxation is a dirty word among First Nations, there is no mechanism to redistribute the wealth to ensure the entire community benefits.

And what's a decaying, dystopian criminal enterprise without an underclass to look down on...

Its membership law forces residents to leave the reserve if they marry non-natives — the Canadian Charter of Rights & Freedoms be damned.

Forget about the Charter of Rights, this is cultural suicide.

Look, not my business, folks... but you might wanna ask the Hapsburgs about the end product of hundreds of years of inbreeding within a statistically limited gene pool. I will say, there are solid scientific reasons you don't continually marry people you're related to over hundreds of years. Hell, maybe David Suzuki could explain it better.

Of course, the race hustlers blame all the resultant misery on residential schools.

If that is so, why aren't the Japanese Canadian (interned during WWII) and Chinese Canadian (disposable industrial fodder for the railroad consortiums) communities currently mired in wretched drug & alcohol soaked ghettoes pursuing dead end criminal careers?

I don't get it.

**********

LAST WORD: Say what you will...

I'm thinkin' this traditional huntin'-fishin' thing... is gettin' out of hand.

A massive police raid at three different Mohawk reserves in Quebec Wednesday morning netted $2.5 million in cash and a large firearms cache, including three grenade launchers.

Where's Wendy Cukier when you need her?

The Skynet Chronicles

"If we're lucky, they'll treat us as pets... if we're very unlucky, they'll treat us as food."

For myself, I look forward to serving our benevolent mechanical overlords...

People will not be the culmination of evolution. We are near the dawn of a post-human future that could be just as prolonged as the billions of years of Darwinian selection that preceded humanity’s emergence.

Of course, it's not unfolding exactly as we imagined.

Still waiting on those lunar bases and flying cars, though.

Yikers.

Dear Toronto Star...

That's a pretty bold statement... especially in light of the fact that you then, professionally & journalistically, choose not to identify the cough, cough... "community" in question.

A trend known as “community guns” accounts in part for the level of gun violence in the city.

Of course, they're not shy about the "sky is falling" lede...

The latest crime numbers from Toronto police show Ross’ death is part of a larger spike in gun violence citywide. Shooting events are up 34 per cent, up from 92 to 122, over this time last year, and shooting victims are up 78 per cent.

Ah, shootings "citywide."

I guess we're talking about the community of man.

Orwell was right

Sure, she's in trouble at the moment, but the fact is, Hillary could name Bruce, er... Caitlyn Jenner as her VP candidate, thus harnessing the apparently massive "groupthink" demographic... and run away with the presidential election.

It doesn't matter that Ms Jenner is a political novice... sheeple-like adherence to popular push-media perceptions trump reality very time.

Need another example?You see, racism (much like trans-phobia) is an insanely popular & irrevocably one way street... the same way that a senior citizen turning himself into a Kardashian sister is not evidence of a surgical fetish, but "an act of courage."

Apparently what passes for reason on this planet has been suspended in favour of reality tv. If you don't toe the line there will be consequences.

Time to pull out that old copy of "Animal Farm."

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LAST WORD: Why stop at flags?

It's obviously time to rename the Jefferson Memorial & Washington DC.

If a government bureaucrat went out...

...and banned hoodies... there would be bloody rioting in the streets of Toronto, Montreal and Vancouver.

So how can the RCMP, without any justification, turn this .22 calibre rifle into a prohibited weapon?

Don't take my word for it. Walk up to any cop and ask them if they'd be more worried about facing a nutjob with a .22 calibre Blaze 47 or virtually ANY non-prohibited, commercially available 30 calibre deer rifle that can currently be bought at Canadian Tire.

This firearm has been banned, not for any legitimate reason, but because Canada's national police force thinks it looks "dangerous."

You’d be forgiven for assuming that the rifles were fundamentally different in some way; that the Blaze-47 was somehow more deadly or more easily concealed than the standard Blaze. But it isn’t. It’s the same unremarkable .22-calibre plinking gun, virtually identical in all technical aspects to the unrestricted Blaze. The Blaze-47, however, comes with hand grips and shoulder stocks that give it a superficial similarity to the AK-47 rifle made famous by the bad guys in ’80s action movies.

Think about all the things you personally dislike. Should you have the power to ban them from "polite" society? Yet, you're willing to bestow that power on some faceless pencil-pushing functionary at the RCMP?

Ever been to Scarborough? Think of those ubiquitous chopped, lowered Civics & Camrys sporting unpacked mufflers and fibreglas whaletails you see at every second intersection.

Confiscating fake racing cars from all those Vin Diesel wannabes would invariably save more lives than banning firearms based solely on their grips and stocks. Best of all, with this RCMP precedent, we don't need to rely on any expensive, time consuming legislation... we'll just base it on whether some civil servant at the Ministry of Transportation doesn't like the looks (or sound) of any particular car. Hells bells, there's some ugly ass lifted monster tucks that spoil the ambiance of the picture postcard suburbs... let's put them on the list too. While we're at it, maybe we could start to dictate what colours people can paint their houses.

You think I'm being silly? Just think about the precedent here. I'm not saying the elected government doesn't have the right to legislate on firearms. Think about what is happening here. The Blaze 47 breaks no laws or even technicalities. The same gun, with a different stock and fore-end is completely legal in Canada.

If you let this happen you're ceding power to the civil service to capriciously shape your lives. That's wrong.

**********

UPDATE: We're not a Police State... yet...Thank goodness for the Conservative government. They're the only party remotely concerned with personal civil rights.

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LAST WORD: Couldn't happen here... right?

"And so in April 1933 it would be easy to say, if you were a middle-class German seeking nothing other than a quiet life, that, yes, these National Socialist chappies are a bit uncouth, but the checks and balances are still just about working. What's the worst they can do?"

Don't bet on it.

When you vote this fall...

...ask yourself... will Thomas Mulcair or Justin Trudeau work to place this bill back on the legislative agenda?

Of course not.

"The Harper government introduced a bill, which passed first reading before Parliament recessed for the summer, to abolish the possibility of parole for certain heinous crimes, including killings of police or prison guards or murders committed during kidnappings, sex assaults or terrorism."

There's only one federal political party that believes in keeping P.O.S. Paul Bernardo and his equally horrific criminal confreres off our streets forever.

Click the pic to find out why this matters now.

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RELATED: Dump the Senate

Do it now.

Conservative MP John Williamson's Bill C-518, which would strip MPs and senators of their pensions if they were convicted of certain crimes, was sent back to the House with amendments — after the Commons had already adjourned for the summer.

Bill C-518 faces little hope of being reinstated and is effectively dead.

You get the government you deserve.

It's all (culturally) relative... right?

Perhaps cops aren't the only people who should be wearing those new-fangled body cameras...

As the adolescent girl underwent gynecological surgery at a western Canadian hospital, a doctor stood by to perform an unusual function.

The physician was there, according to a source familiar with the incident, to sign a certificate verifying she remained a virgin — and was still marriageable in her immigrant community.

Wow... where to start?

Perhaps, unlike the rest of Canada, this "western Canadian hospital" has such a surplus of qualified doctors they can afford to assign the overflow to "virginity patrol" and "ceremonial fire" related duties.

More to the point though... what culture or country has such an ongoing issue with presumably qualified surgeons raping anesthetized adolescent girls during medical procedures, that they have to assign a co-surgeon to make sure everybody (does the rest of the surgical team participate, or do they just watch) keeps their dick in their scrubs?

Please note I'm not just askin' outta horrified curiosity... I just wanna make sure I strike that particular medieval hellhole off my vacation bucket list.

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RELATED: Okay, here's a possible...

Dr Gul Raham, the hymen doctor of Kabul, pointed to the filing cabinet, which contained evidence of all the virgins that had passed through. When a woman arrives, the doctors examine her arms and legs first, then move on to the external genitals. Then they go deeper, inside.

Hey, enough of this... let's get to the science.

I asked about the effects of tampons, but my translater Ahmer didn’t know the word. After a minute of confusion Dr. Raham said, “Oh, condoms, you mean? Condoms cause cancer.”

Hmmm... maybe the University of Kabul Medical School needs to update their curriculum.

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LAST WORD: Be a Pal...

Remember, sharing is caring.

The Confederate Flag Chronicles

The first thing we do... is get rid of all those reprehensible symbols of hate...

C'mon now, folks... you wouldn't put an ISIS bumpersticker on your car... would you?

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RELATED: In other reflagging news...

“We often underestimate just how strongly we respond to what other people actually do,” social psychologist Melanie Tannenbaum explained.

So, less social justice warrior, than, say... sheep?

Sounds about right.

The face that launched...

...a thousand lies...

"Emails from 2009 show that chief of staff Rahm Emanuel and senior adviser David Axelrod understood at the time that Clinton used a private email account and server for official business. Indeed, top officials were forced to explicitly ask Clinton aides for her e-mail address."

Apparently, the spineless Obama Whitehouse was playing by "Clinton Rules".

Way of the Eco Warrior

You can think with the "Big" head... or the "little" one...

Celebrity activist David Suzuki told a Prince Rupert audience last night that "an increase in the human population" was one of the factors impacting "climate change."

Suzuki is the father of five children.

And if you're gonna have more than one family, you need a place to put them, right?

It seems David Suzuki has expensive tastes for someone who wants to shut down the carbon economy within a generation. His primary residence is valued at around $8,200,000.00.

Suzuki owns four properties in some very exclusive areas. One of his properties includes part of an island he shares with an oil company, among others.

Who could be more qualified to lecture the hoi-polloi about wretched excess?