Here's what I'm most curious about

Who exactly, were the brain-dead chimps... who didn't get to be student-body president?

-- DUKE UNIVERSITY -- Mike Lefevre, 21-year-old senior and the president of the student body, said that people were not sure whom to be more concerned about.

“Should we be more worried about the young woman’s privacy or worry about the individuals who were named?” he said. “It’s not so clear to us who was the victim, and who we should reach out to.”

Yup, it's true... "the childrens is are futcher."