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07 November 2006

The Mothership has crashed

In a disaster now being compared by hoary old lefties to the death of Che Guevara, the CBC website tilted too far over to the left this Monday, crushing on-duty propagandist cum technician, the vivacious left-handed, lesbian, albino gadabout Trixie Venomous.
There are a lot of pizza boxes and cola cans piled up around staffers at CBC’s web site, trying desperately to restore the CBC.ca web site after a network server decided to do a sudden, unscheduled disk check, rendering the site’s data unavailable.
Since midnight Monday, the motley crew of union apologists, transvestites and in-house media-zoids have reportedly been seen staggering around CBC headquarters, tearing at their clothes, frantically screaming, "I can't see... I'm blind", whilst occasionally stopping, dropping and rolling on the floor... vainly hoping that following some treasured tidbit of wisdom from their coddled childhoods will ease the unceasing torment.

Outside on the sidewalk, a smallish man wearing a black trenchcoat and sporting large plastic glasses with a fake mustache, who gave his name as Emperor Robert I, was grabbing strangers on the sidewalk and attempting to explain that the outage was the work of the notorious Blogging Tories.

"It's true, it's true", he cried, "It was a woman with seven terriers, I saw her."

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