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01 October 2026

OOOH LA LA...

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-- "The Headteacher in Marseille’s Victor Hugo high school was doused in petrol and fires were started in two schools, as violent student protests rage in France. More than 600 people have been arrested in the widespread violence. Student unions have called on young people to continue the country-wide protests, which has reportedly affected more than 350 schools in France." --

ALWAYS BE AWARE OF THE GUYS WITH THE WAY-COOL NAMES...

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-- "Shoeless madman Jyrell Thomas, 25, was charged Thursday with murder for stabbing another straphanger to death in an unprovoked spurt of violence on a Queens train – as harrowing video of the bloody attack shows terrified riders scrambling off the subway car." --
And you've gotta look out for the gals too, apparently.

BURNHAM IS MAKING ROOM FOR ALL THE NEW 'SPEECH CRIMINALS'...

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-- "Prison gates across England and Wales had a party atmosphere on Thursday morning, with some convicts calling out thanks to Prime Minister Andy Burnham for having slashed their sentences." --

WHEN YOU ONLY WANT HALF THE STORY... CODI WILSON, PROFESSIONAL JOURNO...

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-- "'Four people have been arrested' in connection with a vehicle registration fraud scheme that has been linked to more than $100,000 in unpaid 407 tolls. The investigation, dubbed Project Octane, began in May 2026." --
If you want their names, though... you have to go here...
-- "Haroon Qayumzada, 31, Gajan Karunanithy, 35, Tariq Hameed, 53, and Ismail Ismail, 37." --
You want pictures... CityNews Toronto has 'em.

NOTHING A LITTLE SWEAT LODGE WON'T TAKE CARE OF...

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-- "Nakeem Jamar Johnson, 36, wanted for attempted murder, conspiracy to commit murder, along with multiple weapon and drug charges, was arrested in Cross Lake, a 'northern community' in Manitoba." --
Define 'northern community'...
-- "There are individuals of non-aborginal origin, as well as a number of Metis residing on-reserve. The majority of the population is treaty status." --
-- "Those gosh-darned 'Manitoba' men...
A Manitoba man accused of killing his three young children, their mother and a teenage relative has parted ways with his lawyers for the second time this year." --

I'M SO OLD... I REMEMBER PRE-HOME INVASION TORONTO...

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-- "Toronto Police said when the victim opened the door to grab the package, they were rushed by three suspects, who forced their way into the unit. The suspects ransacked the apartment before fleeing with several luxury items." --
But, wait there's more...
-- "Toronto Police are investigating after a vehicle damaged by gunfire was abandoned following a collision in Etobicoke early Thursday morning." --
And more...
  --  :A man was found suffering from a gunshot wound inside a home in Etobicoke early Thursday morning."  -- 

JUST CALL IN A CANADIAN 'MAID' DOCTOR... THEY HAVE A PERFECT RECORD...

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-- "Christa Pike, Tennessee’s first woman to be executed in over 200 years is still alive after receiving two doses of a lethal injection — as her attorneys race to file an emergency stay." --
AND THE POLS ARE PANICKING...
-- "Tennessee Gov. Bill Lee is pausing all executions this year after Christa Pike survived two deadly doses of pentobarbital." --
And before you get all weepy...
-- "Pike was on death row for luring a romantic rival into a wooded area and torturing her with a box cutter – carving a pentagram into her chest – before smashing her head with a piece of asphalt, claiming a piece of the victim’s skull as a souvenir." --
You think I'm kidding about Canada?

SEEMS THE GUYS WITH THE WAY-COOL NAMES DON'T GET JAIL TIME...

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-- "Roshvin Crofton of Ajax is facing nearly a dozen charges in connection with an arson that damaged multiple homes last month." --

And it's not Roshvin's first rodeo. 

Oops... here comes another one.